How to spot signs of childhood sexual abuse
Content warning: This page contains information that readers may find confronting or distressing.
Finding out your child, friend or family member has been sexually abused can be distressing and you might not know what to do next. We’re here to support you and to let you know that there is information and support out there for you.
Spotting the signs and understanding exactly what sexual abuse is, can be confusing. Hopefully the following information will provide some clarity and guidance.
What is sexual abuse?
When a child or young person is sexually abused, they’re forced, tricked or manipulated into sexual activities. They might not understand that what’s happening is abuse or that it’s wrong for the abuser to do this to them. They might be afraid to tell someone or behave as though this is normal for them to experience, both are valid for the child to be displaying. Sexual abuse can happen anywhere – and it can happen in person or online.
It’s never a child’s fault they were sexually abused – it’s important to make sure children know this.
Types of sexual abuse
There are two types of sexual abuse – contact and non-contact abuse. And sexual abuse can happen in person or online.
Contact abuse
Contact abuse is where an abuser makes physical contact with a child or forces the child to make physical contact with someone else. This includes:
- sexual touching of any part of a child’s body, whether they’re clothed or not
- using a body part or object to rape or penetrate a child
- forcing a child to take part in sexual activities
- making a child undress or touch someone else.
Contact abuse can include touching, kissing and oral sex – sexual abuse isn’t just penetrative.
Non-contact abuse
Non-contact abuse is where a child is abused without being touched by the abuser. This can be in person or online and includes:
- exposing or flashing
- showing pornography
- exposing a child to sexual acts
- making them masturbate
- forcing a child to make, view or share child abuse images or videos
- making, viewing or distributing child abuse images or videos
- forcing a child to take part in sexual activities or conversations online or through a smartphone
Signs of sexual abuse
Knowing the signs of sexual abuse can help give a voice to children and can get support for that child earlier on. Sometimes children won’t understand that what’s happening to them is wrong. Or they might be scared to speak out. Some of the signs you might notice include:
Emotional and behavioural signs
- Avoiding being alone with or frightened of people or a person they know.
- Language or sexual behaviour you wouldn’t expect them to know.
- Having nightmares or bed-wetting.
- Alcohol or drug misuse.
- Self-harm.
- Changes in eating habits or developing an eating problem.
- Changes in their mood, feeling irritable and angry, or anything out of the ordinary.
- Change in normal behaviour for the child, for example suddenly not attending education or avoiding wanting to go home/running away.
Physical signs
- Avoiding being alone with or frightened of people or a person they know.
- Language or sexual behaviour you wouldn’t expect them to know.
- Having nightmares or bed-wetting.
- Alcohol or drug misuse.
- Self-harm.
- Changes in eating habits or developing an eating problem.
- Changes in their mood, feeling irritable and angry, or anything out of the ordinary.
- Change in normal behaviour for the child, for example suddenly not attending education or avoiding wanting to go home/running away.
If you’re worried about a child, there are services you can contact.
NSPCC – Tel: 808 800 5000, Email: help@nspcc.org.uk, or complete their online reporting form.